Mentor

I have always been jealous of people that had mentors. I wanted one, but I had no idea how to get one. How do you find someone to mentor you? What is required? Why would anyone really commit to that time with me when life is so busy? For some reason this year, I decided to finally pursue relationships with two godly women that I would consider my mentors.

I love these women. I love spending time with them. With one, I rarely get time together, but she has definitely challenged me, and her words continue to push me forward. The other I get more time with, and believe me we can talk for hours. Just having a relationship with her encourages me.

One day I introduced this wonderful woman to a friend and called her my mentor. She balked. "We're friends" And I was taken aback. Of course, I hadn't asked her to be my mentor, but why wouldn't she want the title?

I talked to another friend. He said, "what's the difference between a friend and a mentor anyway?"

Better look it up.

Once you get past the friend of Odysseus, you see this definition at Merriam-Webster.com:

: a trusted counselor or guide b: tutor, coach


So, anyone you consider a trusted counselor or guide or tutor or coach is your mentor? I actually like this a lot, but I think the there is a lot more that most people add to this term which makes it daunting. "How could I be a mentor?"

People may think that being a mentor means being perfect. Since no one is, then mentors would not exist. In a Christian context, mentors may think they need to have it all together spirtually. Nope. A mentor should be someone growing, but they don't have to have answers to every question or perfect advice for any possible scenario.

You see, I am a mentor. That's what I do. I'm a youth leader, and I usually have girls that I meet with and spend time with. I know I'm screwed up...and it doesn't take long til they know it too. :) But I love them and I'm there to counsel or guide in whatever ways they might need. Most times that's not that much different than being a friend. Just a listener or an asker of questions. I'm passionate about being a mentor even though I'm not very good at it most of the time. Why wouldn't anyone want that? (Maybe we all think that about our passions.)

In the end, I realized that not every friend of mine is a mentor, but a lot more of my friends really are my trusted counselors at different times and seasons in my life. Whether they accept the title or not, they are my mentors. No need to be jealous anymore!